Middle School Homework Policy

in Essential Ramblings

My older brother sent me this stating that it is his school’s new homework policy — I started laughing out loud when I read it and just can’t help but share it with all of you — a good back to school giggle for the moms and dads who might already be tired of the homework fun that goes on in houses across this great nation…I wish I could quote the person who took the time to write this, but for now it will have to go under anonymous parent and with a thanks for the laugh.

Middle SCHOOL HOMEWORK POLICY

Dear Parents,

Here is an explanation of the school homework policy:
Students should not spend more than 90 minutes per night.
This time should be budgeted in the following manner:
15 minutes  —  looking for assignment;
11 minutes  —  calling a friend for the assignment;
23 minutes  —  explaining why the teacher is mean and just does not like children;
8 minutes  —  in the bathroom;
10 minutes  —  getting a snack;
7 minutes  —  checking for text messages;
6 minutes  —  telling parents that the teacher never explained the assignment clearly;
10 minutes  —  sitting at the kitchen table waiting for Mom or Dad to do the assignment.

LONG TERM ASSIGNMENTS
These are given the night before they are due. This explains the name “long term”.  It is a long term commitment to time that begins at 9:30 P.M. and ends at 11:50 P.M. – or later.  It is important that the whole family is involved in the project. It is imperative that at least one family member races across town to Wal Mart/K Mart for posterboard, and that at least one family member ends up in tears (does not have to be the student).  One parent needs to stay up and complete the project. The other parent needs to call the school attendance clerk and leave a message on the answering machine that the student will be out sick.  Above all it’s not necessary to have the student’s name on the assignment, teachers are trained to guess which student did the work.